After Effect

fops wrote:

Once upon a time there was a little boy, aged 7, who lived in Wales, Uk.
This child was the most adamant fan of tractors there ever had been. He had John Deere posters all over his room, hundreds of tractor toys, a tractor lunchbox, everything. There was nothing in the universe he loved more.
One day, whilst shopping in the local town, he spotted a poster. This poster had the biggest, reddest tractor he'd ever seen on it and it read;
TRACTOR FAIR
THIS SATURDAY
10am-3pm
Upon reading this the little boy was hysterical. He tore the poster off the wall and barreled towards his parents.
"Pleaaaase please please please please please please muuuuuuuuuum, daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. Pleeeeeeeease!" cried the boy.
"I don't know... It's quite a drive away" said his dad.
"We'll think about it." said his mum.
"Oh pleeease! It's all I ever wanted!"
His parents exchanged a glance, (that said "Hm. I suppose that might be all he ever wanted), and said.
"Ok. But you've got to be extra good".
Upon getting home, the little boy dashed upstairs to his room and tore open his tractor book. Surely all of these great tractors would be there. Like that one, that one, that one... But... Taking the folded up poster out of his pocket, the boy pinned it on the wall.
"Woooow" He said. "That's the biggest reddest tractor ever! Better than all the others combined!"
Finally, it was Wednesday morning. Brimming with excitement, the boy ran from stall to stall, sitting on and having pictures with all the tractors. There were hundreds and the boy sat on them all. But one was nowhere to be seen. The biggest, reddest tractor ever was missing. It was almost closing and it was missing!
But then, there was a sound. A deep, low, diesel sound that rattles your ribs and shakes your knees. In a cloud of black smoke, the biggest, reddest tractor appeared up the lane and pulled to a halt before the boy.
"Woooooooooooooooooooooooow!!!" The biggest, reddest tractor ever was even bigger than on the poster! "Mister!" the boy shouted to the flat-capped old man driving. "Can I have a sit on your tractor please?!"
"Fuck off" the man spat back.
The little boys world started to crash in around his ears. He couldn't believe that this nasty old man was so mean. Now brimming with tears, he ran back to his parents and buried his head in his fathers coat-sleeve.
"I want to go home please. I don't like tractors anymore."
15 years later, the little boy had grown into a young man. He was having a pint in a smokey pub (this was before the smoking ban) when his friend comments, "Bloody hell mate, it's really smokey in here, shall we go outside?"
"Nah, it's fine. I got this." replies the young man.
Standing up, the young man breathes all the way out, and sucks in as hard as he can. To everyone's amazement, he sucks all the smoke out of the air and into his lungs. Upon walking outside and exhaling, his friend rushes out, mouth agape.
"Fucking hell man, how did you do that!?"
"Oh, it was nothing. I'm an ex-tractor fan." the young man replied.